It’s LMA, aka the Birthday Girl, back from an extended cat nap.
Thanks for your patience and messages wondering if my pub and I are OK. We are. We just haven’t had a chance to write a worthwhile thought-provoking post – not that that’s ever stopped us before.
So, we thought today, being my fourth birthday as a cat, would be a good reentry excuse.
I was born this day in Brooklyn, seen here. Don’t worry, no one was injured while my pub snapped this pic, just a few near misses.
A lot has happened since we last posted.
For starters, my spoiled rotten Brooklyn-based niece Nina got both a baby brother and another live pet mouse. Life is not fair. First Nina banishes me from Brooklyn to Boston when I was still a wee thing because she did not want to share her space with anyone else. So, I’ve been living with MAD in Boston ever since.
But, oh, now Nina decides she can share her space after all. So she gets a baby brother – the human kind – and another pet mouse. She got a pet mouse last year and I told MAD I wanted one and he said, too bad, I wasn’t getting one. No live mouse in the apartment.
Here is a picture Nina sent of her latest prized pet mouse. Look, it’s even encased in glass, just like a priceless museum exhibit.
Nina has everything, including this view from her litter box:
Compare that to the view from my litter box:
When I heard Nina had a baby brother, I asked MAD if he and My Pub would get one for me. They laughed and laughed, in fact, they are still laughing. Then they reminded me that I had a brother, also the human kind. He even came by today strictly to wish me a happy birthday and while he was here, he thought maybe he’d borrow the car. I am sure that is the exact order of his priorities. I wonder if Nina’s brother borrows their parents’ car.
The only consolation I had from Nina’s good fortune is that MAD and My Pub and everybody else say that Nina’s baby brother is a whole lot cuter than she is. That was comforting until My Pub said, “You know, Louisa, he’s a whole lot cuter than you, too.”
Other big happenings in the sad and dismal life of LMA.
I had my annual check up the other day. Guess what. I gained .7 pounds since last year. I don’t think that’s such a big deal, especially as it’s POINT seven pounds not SEVEN pounds. But MAD and My Pub got all Looney tunes about it. They practically signed me up for Fat Cat Camp. They took away my yummy food and replaced it with tiny portions of this low-fat stuff that tastes awful.
I don’t get it. Nina’s baby brother gains a pound, a whole pound, and why they practically throw a party. Texts are sent, emails, photos, Facetime. You’d think he’s the first person in the United States to gain weight. And, they keep feeding him, round the clock. Here is a picture of what he polished off before breakfast:
He gains weight, they feed him more. I gain less than a pound and they practically starve me.
My responsibilities around here also increased, now that I am a year older. Here I am guarding a great second or third (could even be fourth-hand) Ikea couch that MAD found on Craig’s List. MAD was actually picking something else up, and the seller threw this in for free. Kind of like Ginsu Knives. (“But wait, there’s more!!)
MAD was so pleased with himself. But when My Pub saw it, she said, “Of course it was free … it’s HIDEOUS!!!!”
She is all wrong. Not only is this couch NOT hideous, it is so comfortable. But MAD and I heard rumors that My Pub was trying to get rid of said couch. So, MAD asked me to guard it with my life, which is what I am doing here:
Well, I’m going off to celebrate my birthday. I hope you enjoy my birthday, too.